FUNDRAISER - for Anaya

What scares me

If you are a fan or a follower of Peekaboo Beans, you know that I am passionate about the "Power of Play". As many of you know, I have two Beans of my own and I love to watch them explore the world, learn and grow. My journey to motherhood was long and challenging, and it gave me even more perspective on the blessing that I have in my life.

I want my children to be children, to have a childhood, to not feel the pressures and stresses of a fast paced world at such a young age. There is enough time later in life to experience this.

I parent in moderation. Candy in moderation, Technology and TV in moderation, I believe a healthy balance - not all or nothing.

So tonite as I was getting Cailin's homework organized and packed up, I flipped through the pages of her work as every parent does, taking in all her ideas, artistic creations and school work.

In the pile, was a book I bought for her while travelling recently to Banff. It was sweet note book that I thought would be great for road trips, or travelling - with a nice pack of pencil crayons in a neat tin box (I am a office supplies geek). It posed questions, like draw your family, draw your best vacation, draw your best friend.

I enjoyed seeing all her crafty pictures and smiled with that sense of motherly pride. I turned the next page to see the picture posted here. "Draw your favorite toy". She answered in picture - "I Heart IPAD".

Insert Mother "GASP".

And then my fears of how our world is changing, and how play is becoming a lost art, validated itself right before my eyes.

Obviously that was the first thing that came to her mind, when posed with the question. With ALL the lovely toys, dolls, puzzles, games and simple treasures she has - this is what she answered.

I remember my parents said to me, "come home when the street lights come on" and I long for that for my children. Yet we fear the saftey of our neighbourhoods and question our insticts of letting them go into the world and to fall down and get back up, and we become the "helicopter parent" - a buzz word for their day and age.

Yet they need to play and fall in order to grow.

So I ask you this - do the same things scare you?

Peeka BOOOOOO Beans

Speaking their language....

All week long we held "Fashion Camp" at our corporate offices or what we dub "the Playground". So for a week, I have been driving 3 little girls into work everyday. Each day they chit chat in the back of the car as I drive, I secretly smile at their conversations. So amusing to get a glimpse into their sweet little lives and how they think. One conversation went like this "oh yeah, we did hip hop at our school too" "oh was the teacher the guy that had the earring and looked like a gangster" "what's a gangster?" "Oh someone who tells lots of jokes" "no, thats a prankster" "oh, same thing, whatever"?..

Smile....

The next day, the conversation started something like this. "Oh I watched that on Netflix" "oh you have Netflix" "ya and Apple tv", "oh your lucky" "oh my friend has nine t.v's in their house", "oh really, so and so has 5 computers", "ya I have a DS, and my Mom has and Ipad, so does my Dad, Plus an Iphone and my brother has an IPod touch....."

You see where I am going with this...

This is the generation they live in....this is what they know. It's happening. Period.

As we were arriving at Fashion Camp their minds shifted from the conversation and they could barely contain their excitement for the events that were to take place over the next four days.

And for the next 4 days, I watch ten girls, ages ranging from 5-12, completely engaged, sharing, helping, behaving, listening....creating.

Not one of them required to be talked to, there was no negotiating, no acting out, no rambunctiousness.

Now if you have been in a room with 10 kids for hours on end you can understand that the above is typically rare. There is always some sort of "intervention" that has to happen. After all, they are kids.

What moved me is that given the opportunity to create at their own free will, to not have rules, to not have boundaries, or methods, or guidelines, given space and time, they could immerse themselves completely in their projects, and create, assemble, invent, make...

They recycled clothing into new and interesting designs, they designed, bedazzled, sketched and rejoiced in each others neat ideas and offered up other perspectives.

A typical struggle in our house is trying to get our daughter to focus and do her homework. A daily struggle. Not once in this environment was there a negotiation.

It truly felt freeing. We were now speaking a language she understood, she was in her element and she was learning without even knowing it.

Now, I understand - I just have to learn her language and continue to speak it.

Clearly just playing for four days was the local tongue, without the 9 t.v.'s....

A Pod-Cast with Vancouvermom.ca

Traci’s Tips for Balance in Life
•You can’t be everything and everywhere. It takes a village to raise a family.
•Surround yourself be people who understand you, believe in your concept and passion, and value what you do. Make sure everyone is aligned to your vision.
•Build a support network by hiring the right caregivers and relying on friends and family.

Some Advantages Moms Have in Business
•Resiliency. Moms generally have thick skins.
•Practicality of empathy and understanding. If you can negotiate with children, you can negotiate anything.
•Multi-tasking. Moms are able to manage jumping from one thing to another.

Advice For Moms Starting a Business
•Be realistic. Ask yourself: on your darkest day, will your passion get you through it? Feel the fear and do it anyway.
•Give yourself time to work on your business.
•Understand cash and cash flow. Rather than focus on business planning, it’s less daunting to just put down your thoughts.

Being 2

I recently posted this quote - "A two-year-old is kind of like having a blender, but you don't have a top for it. Jerry Seinfeld". It resonated with me - since that is the "stage" we are in...

I have two girls, one 7 going on 8 next month, and one - well.....TWO.

I find it so crazy to watch the littler one. She has no concept of danger, she runs across a street like a maniac as if nothing could harm her, she dances like Elaine from Seinfeld, she SCREAMS and YELLS and throws tantrums like there is no tomorrow - she will walk to the end of a cliff as if there isn't a drop as I leap through the air behind her like a rabid dog to save her.

She crys and laughs hysterically in the same minute. She doesn't share if she doesn't want to, she throws food, toys, food, well pretty much anything. She asks for pemission to do something she knows she shouldn't do, and when I tell her NO, she proceeds to do it anyway - and gives me the "look" - oh you know the look! She can turn me into a pile of mush with her glowing smile, and her precious cuddles and her angelic face - after acting like a firey devil for 18 hours of the rest of the day.

When I look at this, I am stunned and amazed at what it must be like to be in her body - the world is at her fingertips, she has no concept of rules, or boundaries - it must be like crazy bliss?

I envy this so much, but when I look at her, I am afraid of what is to come for her. We all have to conform at some point, as we can't act like two year olds the rest of our life - nor should we, as much as we may like to throw a good tantrum every now and again.

I guess what I am afraid of is, yes she might lose the "terrible twos" part (slightly happy for this to end), but will she lose that freedom of imagination too, the freedom to be?

That is why I love to Play with her - she sings while she plays, she doddles around with her tea set and states "make mamma cuppa coffee" while working away in her kitchen and feeding her imaginary friends. I love when she fake reads books, flipping pages and making the stories up on the pages, wiggling her little toes with excitement of what her little mind has thought up.

Conversely, my older daughter still loves to play, but can be more guarded in her imagination - more afraid to be free with herself in fear she might be judged by her peers.

At what point does this change and how can we help our children continue to fuel the fire of their imaginations?

I only hope you can help me find some answers and share some of your "terrible twos" too....